Nervously waiting

On this day in my pregnancy with LG (37 weeks 3 days), I spent a Sunday afternoon with my dad's side of the family for Gami Brunch, where I was told by my family that I would either be having the baby the next day (on my cousin's daughter's birthday) or before Christmas (that Friday). I told them they were all crazy, as there was no evidence that the baby was coming soon--I hadn't "dropped," had any real contractions, lost my plug, or even had effacement/dilation checked by my doctor. However, a couple hours later at home, standing at the bottom of the stairs wrapping up a casserole and talking to AD, I felt a giant blub and told AD, "honey, something just happened in my pants." My water had broken, contractions started up, and LG was born the next morning. 

So here I am again at 37 weeks 3 days, one month shy of three years later, with a different set of circumstances. Almost two weeks ago (35 weeks 4 days), huffing my way back to my car after dropping LG at daycare, I was ragged and weary from the pace of working full-time and being a single mom part-time. I called the doctor, expecting them to have me come in, but since I'd been having Braxton Hicks and cramps, they insisted I go to the hospital to get checked out. I was 3-4cm dilated and 70% effaced, and since this was my second baby, they kept me overnight, then released me from the hospital and from work the next morning with instructions to take it easy and try to get to 37 weeks (or more). The following morning, I lost my plug. Almost two weeks later- I'm about the same, though getting even bigger, more uncomfortable, and starting to get anxious. 

I've been having a hard time falling asleep when I lay down in bed at night, even though I tell myself that this could be the last good rest I get before labor begins. I get this nervous feeling in my chest and have to concentrate on breathing. Though I've now read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth two times in the past months, have ideas of what I might do differently this time, have evidence that things might be different this time, and have a positive attitude, I'm still anxious. So, I think it might be helpful to just put out there some of the things that are worrying me:

- AD has not had to work since the 9th. He'll go back to work on the 26th--the Tuesday before Thanksgiving--and work through the 30th--the day after Thanksgiving. If I go into labor while he's at work, he's going to have a hell of a time getting home with the holiday travel. So I'm wondering, should we try to use some natural labor induction methods to get things moving so Baby Girl Meyer arrives before he goes back to work? Or would it be best to just let her come when she's ready and risk AD missing her birth? My next doctor appointment is tomorrow, so I guess we'll just wait and see what she thinks.
- Due to the fact that I have Group B Strep, that I'm already 4cm dilated, and since this is my second baby and my labor (not pushing, unfortunately) with LG was relatively short, the doctor has stressed that I need to get to the hospital right away when I go into labor. But what if this labor is different, and going in right away leads to Pitocin or C-section?
- This is going to sound really silly coming from someone who had her first child, and is planning on having her second child without any pain medication, but the IV I had at the hospital two weeks ago hurt the whole time it was in and for a couple days afterwards. Not looking forward to having another. Also, my doctor has said that I can just have the IV put in and injections of antibiotics put through without having fluids (I swear all of the fluid ended up in my feet last time), but I fear I'm going to have to argue with hospital staff about it.
- Finally, there are aspects of LG's birth and postpartum that I do not want to repeat: I pushed for three hours, different positions did not seem to help, and was really worn out by the end. I tore really badly. 10 days after he was born, I had severe bleeding and clotting, had two excruciating pelvic exams in the ER (seriously more painful than actually having LG), and a D&C to remove placental tissue.

So there it is, my fear. If you're the praying type, please keep these things in prayer for me.

100%

I know I've shared some things before about how AD's profession as a pilot affects our lives (if you want to read about it, click on the "life of a wife of a pilot" label to the right). While I'm not about to do a full out post about the ins and outs of being a pilot's wife, I had a realization today that I want to record.

AD and LG have been visiting AD's family this week, and I have had a bit of free time (which could have been a bit better structured--but hey, I'm pregnant, so what my mind wants to do and what my body will do are two very different things). One of the things I've done with my single girl time is watch a couple of chick flicks. Today I browsed new releases and picked "Friends with Kids," mostly because it had Maya Rudolph and Kristen Wiig in it, and also because it was a comedy about people in their 30's with kids. The storyline is basically that a gal and guy who are BFs decide to have a baby together because the clock is ticking and neither have found the one. And, you guessed it, they realize they're in love with each other and end up together. But not before one realizes it before the other and they spend some time apart.

At first, the friends-with-a-kid-but-not-romantically-involved thing seems to be working really well for the friends, especially regarding mundane, everyday life. When the female protagonist tells the male protagonist that she wants to be a real family, he's not ready. So they spend their time apart, and in the last scene when he's winning her back, he tells her that they were wrong in thinking that they would raise a kid together [as friends] so they could still have the "romantic part" separately, but that he realized that the raising a kid together was the romantic part.

And in a lot of ways, I agree. Mundane, everyday life, and being a family is romantic to me. So I was thinking about what everyday life is like for AD and I. I work Monday through Friday, and he works Thursday/Friday through Monday/Tuesday, so my weekend is Saturday and Sunday, and his is Tuesday through Thursday(ish). There isn't a regular day (or two) when one of us isn't waking up to an alarm and going to work. We don't get to wake up together and spend the whole day together.

I get him after he's worked four days with very little sleep. He gets me after I've been up and worked eight hours. I've been saying lately (though not to him, at least in a direct manner) that AD is going to run me ragged, because when I get home after work he wants to work together to make some progress on projects--this summer it's been the garden box, compost container, basement shelving, etc. While I'm so thankful to have a husband who wants to spend time with me and has the motivation of the Energizer bunny, all this pregnant lady really wants to do after work is have dinner, have some playtime with the kid before he goes to bed, do a load of wash or something low key, and go to bed.

And while I am happy and our life works--Logan usually only has to go to daycare three days a week and we each get two days off with him, we get three/four days each week when we spend as much after-work time together as we can--I can't help but think that I want to wake up and be with them all day. I want to wake up and give them 100% of myself, not what's left over after eight hours of work, because I love them so much and they deserve it. 

I am not saying that anything needs to change; I'm just sharing this realization, and this longing in my heart.

LG's first camping trip

If you didn't already know, AD and I are hardcore campers. For the first four years of our togetherness, we kicked it in a backpacking tent, always in rustic national forest or state park campsites. Almost four years ago, we got our pop-up camper. The only thing that changed with the addition of "Poppy" is that we can accommodate up to three other adults, and the majority of our camping gear lives in her year round, which makes the before and after part of camping much easier, and we therefore go more often--just grab your clothes and food and go! It is truly our home away from home; we have room for all of our camping needs [and more], including the "Oh Sh*t" bag for emergencies. Let me say, though, that our home away from home does not include a generator, air conditioner, TV/DVDs, or even flushable toilets. That's why we go rustic. If you want that stuff, stay home. 

Poppy's first trip [with us] in April 2009--notice there are no leaves on the trees? AD couldn't wait to go

The first summer (2009) we had Poppy, we probably went camping 8-10 times, including our week-long trip to the U.P., which is one of my favorite memories in our *almost* five years of marriage. The second summer (2010) we had her, we only went 3-4 times--we had just bought [and were working our butts off on] our house and I was in the first/second trimester with LG, which included a fun stint with placenta previa where I was on bedrest for a week and then limited physical activity for another month. Last year (2011), poor Poppy only got used once, and that was for deer camp in November, on account of the fact that AD spent the first half of the summer researching, interviewing, and studying for a new job, and then August - October in training in the other D[allas].

Pure Michigan: Lake of the Clouds, Porcupine Mountains

We didn't know how many times we'd get to go this year, especially with AD working just about every weekend--seriously, his first weekend off this year was in July, and not so coincidentally, our first camping trip of the year, and LG's first camping trip ever, was in July. We decided to keep it simple and go to Brighton State Recreation Area, which is less than an hour from home and also where we took Poppy for her first camping trip (with us; she'd had two previous owners who didn't take her out very much). AD was supposed to be getting home from work late on a Friday night, so we planned to take off first thing Saturday morning and come home Sunday afternoon. Well, AD ended up getting home from work before I did that Friday, and talked me into rushing around and forgetting things throwing everything in the truck and taking off that evening; I'm definitely glad we did, though. 

So, how did LG's first camping trip go, you ask? AWESOME. I don't know why we ever had the slightest doubt that he would be anything but a natural camper. He loved it. 

Do you think I could find a toddler-size camping chair when I actually needed one?

On Saturday morning we had breakfast and then took a walk around the campground; LG wanted to hold hands going up and down the gravel road, and I wish I would have had my camera with me to get a pic of AD and LG from behind. But alas, I have memories. Then we rented a paddle boat, and of course, AD took us through these shallow little channels between several different lakes and then threw SG in and had to jump in after her (she's not the spring chicken she used to be). Shenanigans. But we all had fun. Then LG took a nap:

LOVE it.

Per usual, there was an afternoon trip into town for ice cream and supplies. Other than that, there was:

(playing)

and

(eating -- LOVE this face)

and

(hanging -- just to photographically prove that SG and I were there too)

and one

(tantrum)

On Sunday, we had breakfast, packed up camp, and planned on going to the beach (one of the only nice beaches I know of on the east side of the state) before heading home, but LG conked out in the car [sunscreen and swim gear and all]. So when we got home, he washed Poppy with our solar shower and we had a picnic in the backyard.

We're hoping to get to our favorite fall camping spot this month or next.

Since there's a shot of LG and I, and a few of LG and AD, I'm linking this post up to:



 

Our family vacation

AD will have been at his job as a First Officer (FO) at his regional airline for a year as of August 1st. Sometime around the end of the first year, pilots at his airline have a comprehensive oral knowledge and flight proficiency exam. AD will have these exams annually, but the one at the end of the first year is considered to be especially important because it's the last point that the airline can easily get rid of a pilot without having to deal with the union and other hassles. The exam is hard, and if you don't pass, you can ultimately lose your job; after which, the probability of being hired by another airline is unlikely. Quite understandably, AD was quite concerned (and stressed and crabby) about this exam, and he (and I) spent months preparing for it. The good news is, AD took and passed his exam at the end of June, gets to keep his job, and will get a raise when his first year officially ends (yay!). The airline congratulated him on his accomplishment by putting him on reserve for the month of July (boo!).
 

For those not familiar with how airline pilots work, their schedules go by each calendar month. Each pilot bids on "a line" (a schedule) for the next month and are either given a line or are placed "on reserve" (on call) based on seniority. Luckily for us, AD was only on reserve for the first two months after he completed training; he has heard stories of pilots who hired in just before a hiring freeze and were on reserve for years. Pilots on reserve will basically be on call for anywhere from four to eight days at a time (usually with two or three days off in between), and each of those days your shift may either be in the form of "a wrap" (the airline gives you a minimum two hour notice to get to the airport for an assignment) or "ready reserve" (you sit at the airport and have 10-15 minutes to be ready for an assignment). And you can't find out until 6pm the day before what times and what type of shift you will be working the next day. For pilots who live near the city in which they're based, being placed on reserve isn't so bad. However, for pilots like AD (and there are many) who commute to work from another city, this means that you have to commute the night before you actually have to work, and you have to put yourself up somewhere in that city. For AD, this means less time at home and taking public transportation to sleep on college kid's couch (my little brother's friend) while he's on reserve. The only upside to AD's being on reserve this month is that he somehow got most of the weekends off, which should allow us to finally take our first camping trip with LG. We are praying that AD is not on reserve again in August (or anytime soon, for that matter).

With all the variables that affect AD’s work schedule changing by the month, week, day, it’s really difficult to plan a family vacation. This year, my parents happened to be invited to a wedding in Maryland--where AD grew up and his family still lives--right after the fourth of July, so we planned for LG and I to visit AD's family and show my parents around AD's stomping grounds, and AD would fly in for his days off, whenever they should fall during the trip.

So, my dad, mom, LG and I started our drive—I know, I know, as the child and wife of a pilot, you would think that LG and I would fly, but with us not living in one of his airline's hubs and not being able to get passes for non-immediate family members (yet), it would mean having a layover and handling LG by myself, as my parents would take another airline that would offer both a direct and cheaper flight from Detroit to Baltimore. Since I am very nervous about flying with LG by myself and also because my parents were going to need some wheels to get them around Maryland, they decided to just rent a van. And can I say that if it weren't for the limited model selection (especially from American manufacturers) and not-so-great gas mileage, I would totally rock a van?--from Michigan very early on a Wednesday [the fourth] and started back from Maryland on a Tuesday [the tenth].

LG has driven to Maryland twice before when he was five and ten months old, and with him being relatively reserved and a little on the slow side developing his large motor skills, these trips weren't too bad in terms of fussiness or restlessness. However, for this trip, I was a little concerned about how my now full-fledged toddler was going to handle a 10-12 hour car ride, so I did some mad food and activity preparations for the road trip. I brought books, a DVD player (a gift from my parents to LG for the occasion), special coloring book/markers/stickers, a play wallet, and made him a magnetic activity board (which didn't turn out how I had planned, but kept him occupied for a while anyway). Overall, I’d say the car rides went pretty well; LG slept, ate, played, and looked out the window (he liked sitting up high in the van) and kept the fuss down until the last 1-1½ hours of the ride both ways, which is to be expected.

We learned at the end of June that AD would have the Saturday and Sunday of our vacation week off. We also learned at the end of June that AD’s sister and her family would officially be adopting a long-awaited baby on the Friday of our week in Maryland[!] Can we pause for a moment to praise the Lord, and how we can always trust Him to come through for us? For one, that God created and delivered this baby boy out of a not-so-ideal situation to the family who had been praying and waiting for a child, and two, that He did so with excellent timing so that AD, LG and I could be there for Baby C’s homecoming. If they had gotten Baby C one week later, we may not have seen him until November! Not only were we there to celebrate at Baby C’s homecoming party on Sunday, but AD ended up getting Friday off, so we were able to actually go to the adoption agency with AD’s sister, brother-in-law, nephew, niece, and the rest of his family to receive Baby C. (Another testament to trusting the Lord to come through for us, especially regarding timing? The fact that in the nine months AD's been working for the airline, he's gotten two overnights in Detroit. One happened to fall on Christmas. the other fell on Easter. Coincidence? I think not).

AD with Baby C

 Big sister AB & big brother ON meeting Baby C

Artwork in Baby C's room made by ON & AB; this is one creative family!

Meanwhile, my parents went down to the DC area and explored the National Mall and Georgetown before the wedding they attended, which was in a bumper car pavilion at Glen Echo Park. AD and I had planned on taking my parents down to Baltimore to do some more sightseeing when they were finished with all of their wedding festivities on Saturday; however, seeing as it was 104 degrees and 87% humidity that day, their sightseeing was limited to the view from the van and the windows at the Rusty Scupper (which has beautiful views of the inner harbor, but to LG's dismay, no ranch dressing).

We were also able to meet up with my fabulous cousin JB, who lives in Virginia. I say and truly mean fabulous because this girl moved from Michigan to DC--where she knew very few people and did not yet have a job--right after college to pursue her dream job. Four years later, she's got the job (or maybe the precursor to the job--you'd have to ask her--but she's definitely on track) in a very male-dominated field, where she regularly outsmarts (and out-muscles) the boys. Girl is on top of her game, and we are so proud of her.

Other than that, we did a lot of

(visiting family)

and 

(hanging outside)

and

(playing)

and

(eating)

As with any true summer vacation, we each brought home a souvenir.

AD brought home:

and you better believe he would have brought more home if we had the $ and the room

I brought home:

which I've been looking for all season

And LG brought home:

which he is afraid of, which is okay with me. After all, I grew up in the '80s and was brainwashed by my parents that these things were dangerous when little girls were running their Barbie Jeep Pow-Pow-Power Wheels into brick walls and such.

LG also brought home the new nickname Do-Dah; his favorite phrase on the trip.